Synthetic Whitelist Application

Synthetic Application - stalkerino

What is your BYOND key?


What is your Discord ID?

why you need that

Do you usually play a specific character? If so, who?


What whitelist applications have you previously completed?


Synthetic Info:

Name of the Synth Character you wish to play:


What is your Synthetic’s Personality?

None, he is literally a robot

How will they react to the different ranks of the USCM, what would they talk about in a one on one conversation? What are their interests? What is an advertisement logline that could be written for them?


Why do you want to be a synthetic/why should we whitelist you?

Joe needs to do some cleaning

What is your most memorable interaction with a synthetic?

I beated up a working joe while he said “Do not damage seegson property” really funny

Synthetic Character Story:

Joe was a good synth the best of them he only knew one thing. Cleaning and moping was his life he didn’t need anything else





Clean the mess


cleans blood


throws the usefull AP to disposals

What are some scenarios that you can perform combat in? Give us a brief example.

joes can’t do combat not even in self defense so he will just scream “do not damage seegson property”

Final Info:

Have you been banned from CM in the last month for any reason? Do you have any active jobbans?

yes I’m banned from CIC, REQ, MPS, only playable role is squad marine I think it won’t affect me

Are you currently banned from our Discord?


Let us know why you were discord banned.

Because I told firecharge to take off his programmer socks

Do you have anything else you would like to include about your application?

do not damage seegson property


Why was this posted in stories I’m pretty sure I posted it on acid goop.

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epic fail

why is it called stalkerino too

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Joe is Stalkerino alt

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He is cool and robust
+1 :smile:

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sup man we killing quickload tonight




Sup An’kui today we’re SD’ING at briefing?


also yeah time to kill quickload, you’re taking his senator spot

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It is on. The Beacons are lit.

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Underrated, laughed my ass off

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-1 Your character story is too long and while we do encourage you to write a decent bit, this is too much. I’m also not a fan of your synthetics personality, seems a bit extreme to mop floors.

I may change my opinion if you answer these questions correctly:

  1. Someone is insulting you constantly and stopping you from doing your job, how do you respond?

  2. A xenomorph is dragging off a marine, how do you respond?

  3. A marine entered the ARES core and is shouting obscenities and demands you open up the final blast shutters, how do you respond?



The entire point of playing Joes is to be able to be extremely passive aggressive toward the human shaped animals that are the marines.

You didnt mention once your desire to frustrate marines by ignoring them, cleaning while they scream for help, or using a different voice line when prompted to say “the line”.

You arent ready.



“I will forward this report to Apollo.”

Hard -1. Will take jobs away from hard working MTs. I can’t allow this as a senior member of the MT gang.

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-1, very unprofessional grammar, you forgot periods at the end of the paragraphs, as a working joe you are expected to know how to use periods even though all of his lines are pre-generated it just shows your lack of enthusiasm.

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You can all suck my nuts

Specially mensla

  1. I would answer with a politely "Do not damage seegson property*, in the case they don’t stop I grab a axe and decap them

  2. marines are idiots, if he was being grabbed by a benomorph maid, is it’s fault for having Skill issues, I wouldn’t help them.

  3. I would take off his uniform and make them wear a Maid outfit with programmer socks , ziptie they hands, after that I would take them to Briefing Bubble and expose it to the corps shaming them for the rest of the round

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okay so hypothetical

you are working joe #325
working joe #638 is about to be capped (queen low west caves)
but if you save working joe #638 your gun with agrip bc magharn will be melted (clueless medic)

what do u do?