I was so inspired by Military Police Archetypes: A Comprehensive Guide that I wanted to do my own, except with the role I play the most. So here it is, the (probably) accurate guide to every type of Corpsman in CM13.
Now lemme tell you, I know a thing or two about Corpsmen, and after painstakingly compiling a list of EVERYTHING I’ve witnessed over my total 2 hours of watching other Corpsman over the past 18 months, I think I know a thing or two. Here you will watch my life’s greatest work, between the angels who’ve descended to assist the USCM, and the ones who probably don’t even know what role they’re playing. It’s 12am and this is probably a bad idea
Fresh Outta Med School
“What is IB”
We all started here, but unfortunately this is the person who’s between you and the perma timer
Not a bad thing, just give them some time to learn
RP usually boils down to the classic unga marine, that or it’s stereotypical chill dude/stoner who always says “Naaaaaw you’ll be fine”
Worst case scenario they don’t even say anything
Loadout usually looks like their rifleman loadout, just with a lifesaver bag
Probably also playing the exact same way, unga rush and ignore all the dead and almost perma bodies
“Can I have bone gel I want to do surgery”, I wish I was joking but this has happened too often
Give this guy a body with 600 damage and they will literally implode
90% chance that they took some meds from the chemline (usually just IA), but I’ve seen that 10% chance happen
Always wears a backpack, and it’s probably 50% empty space
Atleast knows what most of the chems do, forgets to use them anyway
He’s a lil confused but they got the spirit
Toughened By Minor Inconveniences
“Get the FUCK back here and let me scan you”
Mostly done with everything after experiencing the many, many problems with Corpsman
Incredibly annoyed by how often people will disregard a corpsman’s advice
At some in the operation they’ll just stop caring and just let the rifleman walk around with 5 fractures
Cannot get a rifleman to stand still to heal them
“Get back here you have IB”
Not angry, just very disappointed
Atleast they’ll heal you adequately
One of the few medics who’ll use holo cards
Might focus more on their shotgun than splinting you
“You’ll be fine walk it off”
Actually knows to epi + defib spam when a marine is nearing perma
Always orders the classic IA, MB, and KD
Observer
“Ermmm, I don’t like the look of this!”
Glorified spectator
Always stays atleast full screen away from any of the action (Usually with binoculars)
Because of this, they’re always STACKED with supplies
Wonders why they can’t get the Most Revives fun fact
“I’m gonna go back to the FOB for resupply”, while only missing one trauma kit stack
Always comes out with 0 bones broken, calls it skill
Even if they do get a broken bone, they’ll always try asking a synth to fix them even if its one hand fracture
Avoids touching weeds like the plague, calls it “playing it safe”
Always tries to drag dead marines into a cadeline to revive regardless
Also tends to interrupt other corpsmen by dragging aware a marine they were just healing
Another medic who goes with the standard IA, MB, and KD
Also forgets to use any of those
Uses the backpack but never takes it off to open
Overdose Overlord
“Hi can I get MBT KDT IA Fe D+ ATD NW…”
The glutton of chems
Forgets that chems don’t metabolize in dead people
One of the Corpsman archetypes who will heal you up in a decently quick manner
Doesn’t believe in trauma/burn kits
Has the surgical line and synth graft in their loadout, never uses them
Don’t ask where their stasis bag is
Good luck getting them to fix your IB
Always expect to be bleeding when revived by this guy, he’ll give you iron and say that you’re fine
Ironically doesn’t carry epinephrine in any form
Also the one who walks up to a marine another corpsman is treating to give 4 different pills, and then not telling what they gave
Has a macro for their chemline order and it’s probably like 9 different pill bottles
They will always order this even if its just one nurse in the shipside medical staff
Feeds you every pill in their lifesaver bag without looking at your current chemicals
Look in their backpack and you’ll see medkits with more pill bottles
Always asking other corpsman for more splints
Don’t give them any body with more than 300 damage
Kitted Out
“Yeah uh… just IA, I guess”
Polar opposite of the one above
Probably running the storage rig
Doesn’t know the smart refill tank fits in the storage rig
Heals you pretty fast, always makes sure you have splints on broken bones and the bleeding is stopped
I just wish they knew that you can kit and give pills while splinting and defibbing
Doesn’t carry any extra pill bottles from the default ones, usually just IA and iron
If you ask them their reasoning, it’s always “I feel bad for the doctors”
Fan of the surgical line and synth graft
Carries a surgical bed
Somehow always has a stasis bag on them
Gameplay is akin to a normal rifleman until they see a dead marine
Remembers to shake people out of stuns
Naked And Unafraid
I’ve seen like 2 of these guys before and they’re funny
Corpsmen that don’t wear armor
50/50 between completely naked and external webbing
Somehow have a 0% chance of dying instantly when trying to retrieve a body
You can expect a good fixup when they’re your medic
Spent ATLEAST 2 hours making their loadout to be the most optimal and efficient
Running around with a deployed rollerbed to pull people back at lightspeed
Exceptionally high luck on the frontline, just not anywhere else
This is especially true when it comes to where the hits go, it never hits their chest
Somehow is able to perfectly dodge every grab attempt
Lurker’s favorite snack in the end
The “Medic”
“You took all my meds… now I’m gonna starve”
Probably also has a macro for their chemline order, atleast its not as long
Berates the new nurses for their mistakes
Has a tendency to spam every med on themselves when they get slashed once by a drone
Always on tramadol and oxycodone
Never asks other people to splint their fractures, does it themselves
Races the Scout for first to get captured
Carries more magazines than medicine
“Accidentally” messes up and makes a specialist go perma, definitely isn’t going to steal their gear
Probably begging the demo spec for their spare rocket bag
Alternatively, doesn’t take a bag, using a MK1 and shotgun. Yes I’ve seen this.
Really only here for the medical skill to use kits, injectors, etc instantly on themselves
Trying to loot them after they die yields almost nothing
Also the type of person to get mad when another corpsman doesn’t heal them in 0.2 seconds
Talks about how they got most kills as hospital corpsman
Secret Doctor Man
“Don’t worry, I’ll just do surgery- Oh wait”
Doctor main now playing hospital corpsman
A bit too afraid to run in and grab corpses, even when xenos are falling back
Cannot live with medium/heavy armor slowdown
Probably not wearing a helmet
Uses double pressurized reagent canister pouches
Trying to teach the new doctors/nurses in the chemline, might get bwoinked for that
Mediocre resource management at best
Spends a bit too long making sure that you’re “good to go”, usually waits until you’re atleast 80% health
Carries a surgical bed and a near infinite number of stasis bags
Actually does holo cards and pays attention to them
“Waiter!! Waiter!! More trauma/burn kits please!!!”
Unfortunately, always unlucky, everytime they check a groundside Wey-Med it’s empty.
Meta-Medic
“Sorry I’m a bit busy, this one is priority”
Playing corpsman in order to stay glued to their friend and heal them up constantly
Good luck getting more than a pill from them
It’s even worse if their friend is a specialist, they’ll make up an excuse as to why they let you go perma (Working on the green line spec is more important than the blinking red line comtech)
Carries an ungodly amount of oxycodone/tramadol
Incredibly mediocre at medical, another one who believes solely in letting chemicals do the work
Revives other people if their friends aren’t dying, just wants to see themselves on the most revives fun fact
Will go through tooth and nail to save their friends
“Too far away, too risky” if not though
Ironically, doesn’t use the item designed for tracking your “buddy”
Thank god these guys are a bit rare, but I’ve seen it I swear
Some of them are trying to teach a friend who’s new, and making sure they don’t get instantly murdered within 5 seconds
Guardian Angel
“Just another day saving lives”
What every Corpsman aspires to be
Either ridiculous bravery or 0 regard for their life, will pull you back from the middle of hive weeds
Machine hands that will revive you in 5 seconds tops
Literal necromancer with how they’re reviving corpses
If you say that you lost a rollerbed, health analyzer, etc, they’ll pop out of the woodworks and give you a spare one
Somehow never resupplies once during a 3 hour operation
Runs in after a queen screech to shake everybody
When it comes to their gun, you’d see higher accuracy from a random number generator
Hi Reid this is basically you
